Waiting

Waiting is hard. Whether it is waiting for something trivial, like in line for coffee, or something major, like waiting for someone at a hospital, I have a difficult time with being out of control of the clock.  I will not claim that I am a go-getter, that I have to be moving, doing.  That's not it.  I can sit around lazy with the best of them. It is control.  I like to be in control.

Now I'm not talking about being the boss, or telling others what to do.  I am perfectly capable of letting others be in charge, as long as there is control- a point, a purpose, and a destination. The key here is control; someone has to be in control.  That the situation is under control and the time on the clock is not ticking away pointlessly. 

Which brings me back to waiting. Waiting on someone else for anything means they in control of my clock- my seconds are ticking and I am not in charge of their expenditure.  I cannot ever have those seconds back and I despise the fact that I lost them to waiting.

I realize and accept that waiting is an inevitable part of life.  But I don't like it, and it's still hard.